Stripper Boots and Wedding Rings
by Lilikinz
Summary: My Chemical Romance, but not really. Life without the band. Frank's getting married, so for his bachelors party, Ray and Bob take him to a strip club. Chaos ensues. ..Will contain some no so innocent parts.
1. Chapter-1

"Iero's getting married! Iero's getting married!" Ray chanted, or rather sang, tapping a beat into the steering wheel while he drove. He's been doing this for the past ten minutes, and it's starting to get on my nerves. It's true, but being constantly reminded wasn't exactly helping the nerves.

"Wanna tell me where we're going yet?" I asked, irritated, but still no answers came from Ray. Bob and Ray had abducted me from my pleasantly quiet last day as a non-married man, to go on some "life altering adventure", as they described say I wasn't exactly thrilled would be an understatement.

Another five minutes, and I was humming along with Ray's little song, which I believe to now be burned into the internal hard-drive of my brain for all of eternity. Fucking Ray. I tried putting my head back and shutting my eyes, but Ray's not the most..what's the word.. careful driver, and getting sleep with him behind the wheel is damn near impossible.

So, I took to staring out the window, imagining all the (horrifying) places we could be going. Sooner or later, I might have zoned out a bit, we pulled into a parking lot in a rather grimy, scary part of town. And- oh sweet Jesus. They didn't.

"You fuckers.. brought me to a strip club. The night before my wedding?" I asked, incredulous. They both gave sheepish grins.

"Well.. Yeah, where else would we take you?" Bob gave me a sideways glace, leading our way into the building. The only light source seemed to be large neon signs, making the whole place look even more unappealing. Bob talked with the bouncer, using more hand motions than words, while I stared at the ground, plotting my escape from this torture.

"Hey, come on, lets go." Bob ordered grabbing my arm and dragging me in, quickly ruining my "Oh hey look! My feet are cemented to the ground!" plan. Damn.

Bob lead us to a room in the back, shoving me in a booth with Ray, then wandering off in search of drinks. There were scandalously women on almost all sides, so it was somewhat hard to find a place to stare that maintained my eye sight's innocence, but I managed.

"Awe, come on Frankie. It's gonna be fun!" Ray finally spoke up, sounding chipper.

"No, you're not allowed to talk to me. I hate you both right now." I grumbled, though I happily took the drink handed me when he returned, though it was way too sweet, and way too weak for this situation.

At some point or another, my will broke, and I looked around. I don't really understand what the point of places like these is. I mean, it's not very exciting. It's just a bunch of girls swinging themselves around to shitty techno music.

Once the drink, which turned out to be a lot stronger than I originally thought, kicked in, I got it. And Bob kept bringing me more, which was fan-fucking-tastic. Maybe it wasn't so bad. The music was kinda infectious, and the girls were pretty, as long as you didn't look too closely. Ray and Bob's conversations was dulling into a nice, kind of constant noise, and maybe I didn't hate them so much.

And after about the third drink, everything started to feel good. Probably too good, because soon I got that familiar pain in the ass, er.. groin, sensation, that meant I needed to excuse myself to go to the bathroom sooner, rather than later.

So, less than gracefully, I extracted myself from the booth, and toward what (hopefully) we're the bathrooms. My motor skills we're rather impaired, and my sight not much better, so God knows where I'm headed.

Suddenly, there was the dark form of a person, less than ten inches in front of me, and apparently I have forgetting how to steer myself out of the way. Or maybe he swerved the same way I tried to. Either way, we collided, my face to their shoulder. Rather painfully, might I add.

"Oh shit! Sorry man, didn't see you there!" Spoke a voice, right fucking by my near, nearly making me jump out of my skin. I stumbled backwards a step, before a hand caught my shoulder, stopping me from falling on my ass. "Whoa there. You okay?" The voice questioned. This time, I could easily distinguish it as a male voice, probably only slightly older than I was.

"Yeah, don't worry; I'm good." I slurred, hoping I didn't sound as stupid as I thought I did.

"First day on new legs?" The stranger asked. I chuckled in response. Once I focused in on his face, I was shocked to see he was probably prettier than over half the girls here, with big hazel eyes and just a bit of eyeliner smudged under them. He had a button nose, and pale lips. Dark eyebrows matching dark, shaggy hair, were pushed together in..concern? I mean, I was tipsy, but not that bad.. or was I?

"Yeah, I guess so." I finally said, hoping I wasn't staring for too long. Way to act like a freak Frank, good job. He just nodded.

"I'm Gerard, by the way." He- Gerard, stated. After trying to lasso my thoughts into something coherent, I came up with what my brain assumed to be an appropriate answer.

"Yeah, uh.. I'm uh. Frank. Nice to meet you..?" Smooth. Real smooth Iero.

I watched as his pale lips and tiny teeth contorted themselves into a mischievous smirk. "Yeah, Nice to meet you too."


	2. Chapter-2

I watched as his pale lips and tiny teeth contorted themselves into a mischevious smirk. "Yeah, Nice to meet you too."

"Uh.. yeah." I said smartly, looking at him somewhat warily.

"Well, my shift starts.. shit. Now." Gerard said, glancing at his watch. "uhm.. you're welcome to come, if you're interested?" He said, flashing me that smirks that was balancing on the line right between harmless and fucking irritating, but my short-spanned attention was caught on whatever he was talking about.

"Uh. Sure." I nodded, and he lead me into a separate room, shoving me into a booth and walking away. I glanced around, noticing that the males were out numbered by the females now. Odd. Oh well. After a few minutes, music started playing, which was _Pour Some Sugar On Me _by Def Leppard.

And- OH. Now I understand what he meant by shift. Though, I probably could've figured it out if I had paid more attention. If the white button down, half way unbuttoned, and the tight leather pants didn't give it away, then those fucking boots- like combat boots, though they went up to almost his fucking knees.

And let me tell you, he was fucking working it. He had that kind of grace and elegance you don't usually associate with strippers.

Though his clothing covered most of him, those damn pants did not leave much to the imagination. After an embarassing amount of time spent staring at his ass and.. other regions, I tore my eyes away. Some part of me, probably the same part that made me forget how to walk, thought it was a good idea to look at his face.

Oh,sweet mother of all that is holy, he's fucking watching me. I swear, my face tried to go three shades paler, and turn 900 different shades of red at once. I looked away, but not before he flashed that damn smirk again.

None of this is exactly helping the, uh, uncomfortable situation I had before. At the most, it's making it worse. Which is not good, because at this rate, I'm not going to be able to get up from the table. Internal combustion sounds like a possibility right now. Taking slow, steady breaths, I dare a glance back to Gerard.

..Jesus fuck, now he's running his hands over himself. That little part of me, which I'm hoping would just die by now, brings up the image of me running my hands all over him, and him making those faces for me, not just because it's part of his routine and-

NO. Bad Frank. Bad. You're gonna be a married man soon. Now is not the time to think these things. Jamia, think of Jamia. Yeah.. not working. Throwing care to the wind, I look back up, because obviously I haven't learned from where that got me the first two times.

Oh, lovely, he's on his knees now. What a lovely mental image. I'm so going to hell for this, if I wasn't headed there already.

Eventually, the lights dim, and Gerard walks back stage, but not before he practically eye fucks me for a good minute. I put my head on the cool surface of the table infront of me. Because suddenly, everything feels way too hot, way to loud, and way too much.

I don't know how long I sit there like that, but sooner or later, someone slides into the booth beside me, and I'm praying it's Ray, or even Bob, but of course not.

"Enjoy yourself?" I can practically hear the shit-eating grin in his voice. Bastard.

"Uh.. yeah.. Probably a bit too much." I mumble the last part before I can stop myself, hoping to whatever's up there that he doesn't catch it, but he does. I can tell he does, just by the way he chuckles, even if he doesn't say anything. It's quiet for a while; me not trusting my tongue, not daring to say anything, and from what I can tell from my sneaked glances at him, he's lost in thought. Finally, he speaks up.

"You, know, I can help you with that." ...and I wish it was back to silence.

"..With what?" I ask, playing dumb. The smirk on his face tells me he knows. And the hand he puts on my upper thigh just proves that. I inhale rather loudly, and then mentally punch myself in the face. "O-oh, that." I stutter out, "It's okay. I'm- I'm good." Why do I even open my mouth?

"Hm.. No, I think you could use some help." He says, grabbing my arm, and pulling me out of the booth, and to the bathroom.

"Oh, okay.." I mumble, not really having much say in the matter. Not that I mind, but I didn't say that.

I followed him into the bathroom, trying not to raise an eyebrow when he put an "out of order" sign on the bathroom door. He just smirked that stupid smirk at me, pushing me so my back was against the sink. I looked at him in surprise, and he dropped to his knees in front of me, unbuttoning my jeans. I made a face in discomfort, but when his hand began to rub my thigh, I relaxed a bit.

"Don't worry, it won't be so bad. I'll bottom, but first...let's get you warmed up." He looked up at me, smirking. His eyes shined with lust, and I'm almost positive mine did too. Oh God, I'm so going to hell for this.

He pulled my pants down enough to get my half hard dick out, and he began to pump gently, still looking up at me. I gripped the sink behind me, breathing heavily and way too loud. It just felt...good. More than good; super-fucking-god-damn-amazing.

"Ohh..." I moaned, letting my head fall back a bit. I heard him giggle before his mouth was on my cock. Holy...

He batted his eyelashes while he looked up at me, his perfect mouth wrapped around my cock. I couldn't stop the noises coming from my mouth, unable to fight the pleasure that was taking over my body.

I knotted a hand in his hair and pulled, and the moan he made as he continued to suck sent vibrations through me.

"Shit..." I cursed under my breath. He moaned again, and I felt myself getting close.

"Gerard...I'm so...mm..." I closed my eyes, about to come undone. Suddenly, his mouth was gone.

"..The fuck?!" I asked him, my eyes opening. He laughed quietly.

"Did you forget that I want you to fuck me?" Gerard purred, running his hand down my chest.

"...Oh." I breathed. I began to run my hands all over his perfect body, pulling him up against me. He giggled, and wrapped his arms around my waist, leaning down to kiss my neck. My hands found the button on his leather pants, and I unbuttoned and unzipped them, sliding them down so they were just below his ass. I whirled him around and bent him over the sink, slapping his ass hard, well, not too hard, but hard enough. He moaned like the little whore he probably was. I pulled my pants down to mid thigh, and put a condom on my cock, that I (miraculously) found in my wallet. After a moment, I rolled one on him too so we didn't make a mess.

Gerard wiggled his ass at me, and I resisted the urge to spank him again.

"Gerard...what do I do now?" My drunkness and lack of common sense getting the better of me, once again.

"Oh! Hold on. This might be weird." Gerard wet his fingers in the sink, and began to _touch himself_, shoving his fingers in his ass and wiggling them around. He made these hot little moans in the back of his throat, and I couldn't help but stare. A few minutes later, I was pushing inside him, and he was groaning and I couldn't think and-

I swear to God, I may be going to hell, but this was fucking heaven.

I fucked him hard, and he didn't complain. I pulled his hair, making him cry out, and he reached back to slap my ass. I made an odd moaning noise, and put my weight on him, fucking him as hard as I damn well could. His strangled noises echoed through the bathroom, and I didn't care how noisy we were. It felt to fucking good to stop.

In what seemed like hours, but was actually somewhere around ten minutes, we both came undone, yelling out our releases. I shakily kissed his cheek after I pulled out, and threw the used condom in the trash, pulling up my boxers and jeans and buttoning them. I slid the condom off him, and pulled up his sexy leather pants, and buttoned them. He smiled at me this time instead of smirking, and I smiled back slightly, feeling awkward now that all was said and done.

"So..uh. Yeah. Thanks...?" I muttered, not daring to make any more eye contact, in fear the awkwardness would cause both of us to burst into flames, or some other dramatic even. I heard him chuckle somewhere in front of me.

"I'll see you around, Frank." He said, his smile showing through into his voice.

..And then realization hit me in the face. Well, actually, it punched me, rather hard, in the face. I'm getting married tomorrow. And I just fucked a dude. Way to be Frank, way to be. I'm sure the panic showed on my face, but he either didn't notice or didn't care.

"Well.. see. The thing is, I don't think I'll be seeing you around. Like. Ever." I clarified, glancing up at him. And there's that God damn smirk.

"Oh, trust me. You'll be seeing me again." He laughed, and walked out, leaving me standing there, gaping at him while he walked away.

Eventually (after a lot of hair fixing, and clothing readjustment) I walked out, and set off on the quest of finding Ray and Bob. Strangely enough, they were in the same booth they had been (or so I think, the booze was effecting me more than I thought).

"There you are!" Ray exclaimed, with a giggle tacked onto the end. I just nodded. "Where've you been? We thought you got killed!"

I let out a nervous chuckle. "Well see-

"You know, I'd rather not know." Bob cut me off, with a chuckle. I shook my head at them, and somehow managed to convey my need to go home. Less than gracefully, we all found our way out, and piled into the car, Bob driving. I still got stuck in the back, much to my displeasure.

The car ride was less than pleasant, but figuring out how I'm going to lie my way through this, was even worse.

~~~~  
Special thanks to my love DeadToLove ( u/2065930/ ) for writing the not so innocent part. 3


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